Celebrating the Life of
Philip Ellis
November 11, 1965 — January 11, 2024
Memories and Condolences
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New Year's Eve 2024: Phil came into the city from Virginia to celebrate...he was very excited to wear his tuxedo. When our initial plan to watch the ball drop from my cousin's Times Square hotel crumbled, I'd presented him with several alternatives: a local pub crawl, an evening of live music, or a black-tie event. Without hesitation, he chose the latter. The event was hosted by a pretentious "artists' collective" who touted the evening as "an ode to our past, a tribute to our future, and an invitation to be absolutely present to the experience laid out before you." As we set out, awaiting the downtown-bound 1 train at 103rd St., he snapped this selfie. Upon arriving at a townhouse, we ascended to the top floor, discovering a Ravi Shankar-inspired space enveloped in incense and sitar music. I recognized the exhilaration this nightlife brought to Phil after his recent years of marriage and family life. Although I had my share of such experiences over the years, witnessing Phil's genuine happiness, expressed through wry enthusiasm and keen interest, brought me joy. As a self-appointed audience of two, we assumed the role of taste arbiters, passing judgments on our fellow guests' wardrobe choices and decorum (or lack thereof). As the clock ticked towards midnight, I guided Phil through a crowded stairwell to a 1920s jazz lounge-esque room. There, in lounge chairs near the band, we counted down, tossed confetti into the air, and ushered in the first moments of 2024 singing along to "Auld Lang Syne." That night showcased all of Phil's wonderful qualities—his humor, zest for life, and generosity. It is now a cherished memory, encapsulating the essence of who he was.
I first met Phil in 8th grade at Columbia Grammar and Prep School. While we did not become very close friends that that point, we had some bonding as being somewhat outsiders at the school. The next year, we both found ourselves at Bronx Science and that begin years of friendship lasting over 4 decades. During college and graduate school time, the frequency of contact was reduced, but no matter how much time had passed, I always felt we could simply pick things up again without an issue. As I type this, I think back to the time I happened to be in DC and had a few hours free and Phil gladly came to hang with me at the mall. He showed up with a kid at his side and another strapped to his chest. We managed to hang out, see the air & space museum, and simply catch up and learn more about where we were in our lives. For both of us, there was a big transition from going to graduate school life to family life. Fast forward some and we have teenagers and are getting together much more often as it becomes easier to travel for things like reunions or take a day longer on a business trip. Nick Malter along with social media allows even more visibility and updates between our lives as well. Then came the pandemic and we had occasional online movie group watching reliving some great old movies like “Breaking Away” and "Saturday Night Fever". As the pandemic started to abate and folks could travel we were able to get a small group together and spend a long weekend biking around Eugene Oregon. We were all expecting to plan another such trip soon and many more with him…. I will miss Phil's friendship, sarcasm, intelligence, humor, and serious side. I know I am not alone in struggling how to mentally navigate his death and while there are many more who are more greatly impacted by this, I still find myself spending a lot of time "processing" it.
I'm certain that all of us who knew Phil through CBO are devastated that our field has lost Phil's intellect, curiosity, and dedication to the highest quality evidence-based policy. He will be greatly missed as a colleague and as a friend I sought advice from many times. I think of him every time I see "his" mug on my desk.
In some ways, I owe my strong relationship with my cousin Elsie to Phil. I knew Elsie before of course, but since his house in Vienna was 10 minutes away, I got to see both of them a lot after moving to DC. For that time and relationship, I am and will be forever grateful. Phil was there when we moved in. He was there for birthdays and holidays. He and Elsie were a wonderful match and my daughters loved to play with him. This picture is from Zoe’s second birthday. We still had boxes everywhere but he decided to play diner with Zoë. She made him wooden pizza and he taught her about charging customers money. He was also a great conversationalist. We talked about banking, pharma, economics broadly, old movies, music…so many things. I’m going to miss him but am glad I knew him even if only for almost two years.
1-20-2024 I first met Phil in the fall of my sophomore year at Bronx Science in 1979. He was a friend of a friend’s who had gone to the same Upper West Side elementary school. Back then, a year’s difference in age seemed to be a big deal to me. In fact, I generally made it a point not to hang out with any of the “younger” kids and prided myself on how many older friends I had at Science. Phil was different though; while he must have been only 13 when we first met, he made a lasting impression as someone more serious. He always seemed to be unusually contained and within himself – although everyone knew that Phil could also be cuttingly funny with a more than an occasional wild streak. He very quickly became one of our gang. The group of friends that would make the long walk from school to the Bedford Avenue subway station and take the D Train home. Those train rides were epic. To say that we were disorderly would be an understatement. From getting on the intercoms of the trains and making “public service announcements” to opening and closely doors of train cars, we did it all. Frequently, we all went to my place or Mack’s on West End Avenue where we would shoot hoops, listen to music, and talk a great amount of smack-talk. Through the years at Science, Phil and I became closer and closer. He would play the roles of math tutor, music fan, downtown clubbing running-mate, fellow athlete, confidant, and loyal friend. He would sometimes sleep over at my place, get his fetish-like Tropicana and Entenmann’s breakfast, and then we would often head back downtown again for a game of roller hockey at “forty deuce.” Going nightclubbing and seeing our favorite bands of the day perform was a serious pursuit. We would typically start the evening at the old Peppermint Lounge and then head to Danceteria, the Mudd Club and after closing, on to places like Berlin and other after-hours joints. There were so, so, so many uplifting and electric nights I remember being with Phil while watching groups in relatively small venues that would go on to wide acclaim. Off the top of my head, I’m thinking about bands ranging from U2, Depeche Mode, Duran Duran, REM, The Ramones, The Specials, The English Beat, Gang of Four, Lydia Lunch, Romeo Void, Squeeze, Grand Master Flash and the Furious Five, Run-DMC, ABP (one of our sleeper faves), and the list goes on and on. The music and the culture were important to us both. We took the whole thing pretty seriously (as we did the associated chasing of girls). In fact, between my nocturnal activities with Phil and other friends, delivering pizza on Columbus Avenue 2-3 times a week, it’s a wonder I ever graduated! Phil was among a handful of friends who really helped me cram for finals tests. Poor Phil…just thinking of him trying to teach me a years’ worth of advanced physics concepts so I could simply pass the dreaded Regents Exam (I got a 92 BTW!) gives me anxiety just thinking about the whole endeavor. Suffice to say, I graduated and went off to college in Boston. Phil would often visit over the years. In fact, I believe he may have moved there during at least one summer and he certainly lived there during his years at The Kennedy School and later at MIT. Phil would become friends with my wife Maren. The two had an excellent, no-bullshit, type of relationship. I think Phil really respected Maren and vice versa. This brings me to a vivid memory both Mar and I have of Phil showing up unexpectedly one night while we operated our sushi delivery and catering service. It must have been around midnight when Phil knocked on our door with a terrific black eye and other bruises. When asked what had happened to him, he gave a simple “I got into-it with some people…it’s no big deal.” This was not a “one off,” in the sense that Phil would often “get into it” with people. To his great credit and my admiration, he was fearless when pitted against what seemed to be formidable opposition. His days playing pick-up basketball in DC were a case in point. I had been staying with Phil at his apartment on Capitol Hill prior to starting grad school at GW. Phil would have no qualms about driving the lane against opposition that were twice as large. He would insist on calling fouls and despite intimidation would refuse to play unless he was given his free throws. I can go on and on ad nauseum here. I’ll keep lots of these memories on-tap to discuss with his other friends. So…I knew Phil for ~45 years. The news of his death hit both myself and my wife like a thunderbolt. Just shock. Simply dismay. Our thoughts very quickly went to his children (both Henry and Olivia went to Michigan as did our youngest son). How could he do this? The only answer I have to give is that his illness (which he kept a secret from just about everyone) overcame him. So much more to say but I don’t want perfection to be the enemy of good enough. Phil will be missed mightily. Looking forward to talking with his friends and family about him and giving him a proper send off. Randy
We didn’t know Phil that well, but were so looking forward to knowing him better. This picture of a recent visit showed what a wonderful smile he had. He made our niece Elsie happy. We will miss him, and hope he’s at peace. ❤️ John and Olivia Farr
Phil was patient and kind. I loved watching him interact with my girls. I think he was a little shocked when Zoe brought him a huge stack of books to read to her, but he did it and was engaged. They finally had to call it quits when the mosquitos started to bite too much long into the evening. The other night Zoë listed off the people who love her as she went to sleep. My heart broke when she said Aunt Elsie and quickly followed that up with “and Phil.” I could barely respond before I had to hide my sadness.
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